The Orgasm Gap by Lora Dicarlo part 1

The Orgasm Gap by Lora Dicarlo [1] part 1

Reprinted with permission from

Mind the Gap

Orgasms are great. We’re pretty sure no one would argue that point. They feel great, they’re good for you, and if you have a hand (pun fully intended) in helping someone achieve one, that feels pretty great too.

But not all of us are experiencing orgasms as nearly often as others, and it’s happening across the US. This is the orgasm gap. If you’re not familiar with the term don’t worry, we’re going to take a deep dive into the epidemic and how to fix it.

One-third of people with vaginas are infrequently orgasming when they have sex. (Infrequent is defined as having an orgasm 50% of the time or less…sometimes never!) The gap exists between heterosexual and LGBTQ+ people: 66% of heterosexual people with vaginas orgasm frequently whereas 73% of people with vaginas within the LGBTQ+ community do. But don’t worry—we’re here to help.

Now that we know what it is, let’s delve a little deeper into why the orgasm gap exists. Wanting to understand more about pleasure, we surveyed more than 1,000 people about their orgasms and sexual experiences.

Here’s what we found:

  • 52% of people who orgasm frequently are comfortable telling their partners what they enjoy vs. 26% who don’t orgasm frequently
  • 36% of people who orgasm frequently are confident in their bodies vs. 19% who don’t orgasm frequently
  • 49% of people who orgasm frequently report having a skilled partner vs. 18% who don’t orgasm frequently
  • 82% of people who orgasm frequently know the location of their clitoris vs. 71% who don’t orgasm frequently
  • 49% of people who orgasm frequently know the location of their G-spot vs. 30% who don’t orgasm frequently

The takeaway? Knowing and understanding your anatomy, talking with your partner, body confidence, and a willingness to try new positions are all related to how often you orgasm.

Taking Ownership of Our Orgasms

Now that we’ve covered what the orgasm gap is, you might be wondering what steps you can take to avoid falling into the orgasm gap. Let’s start at the very beginning.




a climax of sexual excitement, characterized by feelings of pleasure centered in the genitals

That’s true, in many cases. Merriam Webster never leads us astray. However, it is important to note that the genitals are not the only body part involved in achieving various types of orgasm. More specifically, orgasms are characterized by the rhythmic contraction and relaxation of muscles as a result of stimulation and arousal. Those muscles may be in several different erogenous zones, not just the genitals.

Many people report the following to be particularly sensitive and enticing areas:

  • Nipples
  • Feet
  • Neck
  • Hips
  • Buttocks
  • Ears/Face/Mouth

This list is by no means exhaustive. Truly, an erogenous zone can be anywhere you enjoy being touched. All consensual touch can be intimate and erotic in the right setting.

To be continued

[1] Lora Dicarlo

Lora DiCarlo started in 2017. Our premier device was inspired by the experience and persistence of our founder and CEO, Lora Haddock DiCarlo, and developed in partnership with Oregon State University’s Robotics & Engineering Lab.

Things really got hot when we won a coveted robotics innovation award from the Consumer Technology Association. When the award was rescinded (what?!), it kickstarted a critical public conversation about gender equity in tech and the right to pleasure for all people.


“I see a world where sexual stigma and shame are erased, and gender equity and empowerment are embraced.” – Lora DiCarlo, Founder & CEO

We believe in empowering people of all genders to explore, educate, love, and accept themselves and others. By embracing diverse passions, preferences, and anatomies we are able to solve problems that affect everyone. When people are empowered, they go on to do great things and change the world.

Ever since, we’ve continued working to change censored and archaic ways of thinking across industries, categories, and the media. To reach our goals, we’ve brought together a passionate group of people with diverse perspectives in design, engineering, and inclusivity. And ultimately, we’ve created more than a company — we’ve created a rallying cry.

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